sexy
–adjective,
1. | concerned predominantly or excessively with sex; risqué: a sexy novel. |
2. | sexually interesting or exciting; radiating sexuality: the sexiest professor on campus. |
3. | excitingly appealing; glamorous: a sexy new car. |
Sensual
–adjective
1. | pertaining to, inclined to, or preoccupied with the gratification of the senses or appetites; carnal; fleshly. |
2. | lacking in moral restraints; lewd or unchaste. |
3. | arousing or exciting the senses or appetites. |
4. | worldly; materialistic; irreligious. |
5. | of or pertaining to the senses or physical sensation; sensory. |
6. | pertaining to the philosophical doctrine of sensationalism. |
Is there a difference to you? Which one do you see yourself as? Do the two intermingle?
For me – They are two different things. I do not see myself as sexy. I see young, skinny chicks as sexy. The ones that wear slinky, sexy clothes. Those cat like girls that move all slinky like. The ones all of the boys look at. I want to be looked at like that too. I want pretty undies and night gowns and sexy clothes too.
But, then I think about sexy as a feeling. Do I feel sexy? Sometimes. But, only if I am in a sexual position. That is a different thing than being sexy, I think. I want to be sexy all of the time. I want to get up and get dressed in the morning and think – Wow! I feel sexy as hell. I usually just feel functional.
Do I feel that I am a sexual person? Yes. I do. Do I think I am a sensual person? Yes. I do. I am very loving, very affectionate and a very physical person. I am a very tactile person. I love to touch. In sexual and nonsexual ways.
I spent a lot of time today thinking about the two and the differences and how they pertain to me. I want to be both. I want to be beautiful, sexy and sensual. I want to put on pretty things and not feel out of place or like I am wearing someone else's clothes. I want to feel like I am in my own skin – not like I am playing dress up.
How do you get there? How do you get to that mental place of being sexy? I know it is all in the head. From there the body will follow. I see plenty of big girls that are sexy. It is all in how they carry themselves. How they feel inside. I need to find that place inside so I can let it show on the outside.
Just one more thing I need to work on.
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